Once upon a time, a dominatrix walked into a fairy tale village where a pig and a princess were doing all manner of unspeakable things... If this sounds like a Fractured Fairytale gone even more wrong, that's because it is. And boy, is it ever delightful. It's The Kids' Show: Definitely Not for Kids, and it's playing at the Magnetic Theatre for the next three weekends. This co-production from Attic Salt Theatre Company and SuperHappy Productions, directed by Rodney Smith and Jeff Catanese, features slightly familiar fairy tales and folktales with a hearty sprinkle of sex, profanity, violence, and inappropriate songs.  In the wrong hands, this kind of production could be disastrous. But nary a joke fell flat at Thursday's premiere performance, when Barbie Angell sassed her way into the theatre and dominated (quite literally) the crowd before taking a seat and telling us a few stories.  These ribald selections include a tale of a princess and a pig, a crocodile-monkey heroin-fueled showdown, and some good ol' fashioned police bullying, with an interlude from "The Learning Corner" to explain the intricacies of your "down there place." Other highlights include Rodney Smith as an Emperor, an Empress, and a cough syrup-addled singer-songwriter, Jeff Catanese as a "Pritchard Park magician," Candice Burchill as a lisping reptile, and Pasquale LaCorte pretty much every time he's on stage. The small cast exhibits just the right amount of creepiness, charm, sexiness, and good humor to make everything come together, and the lack of a consistent storyline (besides the frame story) means that even the most ADHD among us will be hooked.  I don't want to spoil anything about A Kids' Show: Definitely Not For Kids, so I'm just going to stop there. Do yourself a solid and go see it. And please, for the love of God, don't bring your kids.  A Kids' Show: Definitely Not For Kids runs Thursdays through Saturdays through September 9 at 7:30 pm at The Magnetic Theatre (375 Depot St.). Tickets are $16.